I should be asleep. Instead I’m perfecting my ITunes library and remembering a time when Dashboard Confessional was on repeat.
On my one day off this week, I will go to Gainesville to discuss with my grandmother how she will live the rest of her life. A life she doesn’t particularly want to live without my grandfather.
My father is fine with my deciding the fate of his mother’s laundry and eye drops. Her bills and depends. I am fine with him being fine. My grandmother is fine with it too.
I am fine with it too.
I still wish I could turn back time. I hated the insecurity Dashboard Confessional meant. Hated the boy whom I so wanted to love because he caused the insecurity. And as much as I wish I could go back knowing what I know now, I would gladly go back to a time when my insecurity was my biggest problem.