Not A Good Year For Grandmas

A worrying outcome from last Monday has turned into this Monday’s sad news – Tom’s grandmother passed away at the hospital early this morning.

She has not been very healthy in general for a while and went in for gall bladder surgery the weekend before.  The updates following surgery were up and down and this outcome is not a surprise.  But that doesn’t make it less sad.  She was the last grandparent Tom or I had on either side of our families.

When the idea came to me to quit my job as IT manager of the sanctuary and work for my grandmother instead, Tom was very supportive.  I always joke that the little town he’s from is made up entirely of his relations and I’m not exactly wrong.  He grew up with a large close family and everyone helped take care of everyone else.  He never liked that my grandmother lived alone after my grandfather’s death and saw my solution as a good fit.

Because of his large family, we never needed to consider taking extra care for his grandmother.  But the last few times we visited, we did extra stuff that were in our areas of expertise – taking her out to dinner to one of her so-called favorite restaurants*, purchasing and setting up her new computer.

Not everyone can, or should, take off a few years of their career to spend more time with family.  But if you have a spare minute today, consider letting those around you know you care.  It is always too late too soon.

*I say so-called because this restaurant, one that Tom’s warehouse handles, is what she would ALWAYS talk about when we visited.  “When is a <insert national vaguely Italian restaurant name> going to open in Albany?”  I think she asked him that more times than she asked when we were going to have kids.  No lie.  Two years ago I convinced Tom we should take her to one an hour north for a special luncheon.  She was so flustered by the “big deal” we did for her.  And then at the end of the meal?  She said she thought she preferred another Italian restaurant better.  They have better bread.  I think Tom expected this outcome, but was still happy we went.

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