A Sober Cervix is a Happy Cervix

Seeing the doctor for my nose bleeds resulted in calculations of when the last this or that medical test was performed and today I ended up at the office for a complete physical and a tetanus shot.

(Side note: I now understand why people in small towns go to bigger towns far away for medical treatment.  It’s not because small towns have inferior care.  It’s because it can be creepy that your doctor, familiar with your birth control preference and cholesterol, is also a customer at your shop.)  (Creepy in theory.  I don’t mind, but it was a bit of a shock the first time a Hiker Box Facebook video was referenced in an exam.)

Complete physical equals pap smear.  It’s the first time ever this doctor has seen my nether regions.

Her:  Everything looks good down here.

Me:  Is that due to a lack of alcohol, do you think?  Because I have not seen ONE health benefit since I stopped drinking.

Her: …Well…it’s healthy…so if you want to attribute it to that….sure.

Me:  Good!

I bet she can’t wait to stop in the shop sometime soon.

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