Here is the thing:
I cannot follow a recipe.
It is not that I DO NOT follow a recipe. It is that I CAN NOT.
I am SURE I know better than…well, I wished to list specific recipe authors (such as Betty Crocker) but I am humbled by the fact that I AM NOT better than specific recipe authors. I do think I have made specific recipes BETTER than specific authors, but I am sure I have not made every recipe by a certain author better than them.
But the thing is…I DO.
I DO make <insert specific recipe> better than <insert specific recipe author>.
But I cannot prove it. I will NEVER be able to prove this. Because Every. Single. Recipe. I start out thinking, “I will follow this recipe to the letter.” But by step 3 I’m like, “WHERE THE FCUK IS THE PAPRIKA?@!? PAPRIKA FOR EVERYONE!”
And it turns out great.
But do I know the recipe that created that great meal? No. No I do not. I only know I decided on a recipe to NOT follow and then added X and doubled Y and maybe didn’t bake it but pan-cooked it without extra butter and didn’t clean out the bacon fat.
Where the FCUK is the paprika?